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A_womon
Veteran Poster
Username: A_womon
Post Number: 1960
Registered: 05-2004
Rating: 
Votes: 7 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, October 13, 2007 - 06:59 am: | 
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Cynique,
Though this message comes very late, it is most sincere. I am so sorry that you lost your grandson in such a thoughtless violent way. Though many say that time is the great healer, I know from experience that nothing could be farther from the truth. Nothing fills the hole and emptiness that you feel from losing someone who is a part of you, someone you love dearly.
So I apologize for allowing pettiness to prevent me from expressing publicly what I felt for you deeply in private. Please accept my deepest sympathy and condolences for yours and your son or daughters great loss.
Dee aka a_womon |
Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10281
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, October 13, 2007 - 01:29 pm: |
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Thank you again for reiterating your sympathy on my loss, a-womon and for putting all of the pettiness behind us.
My grandson Kyle was killed in June 9, 2005, which just happened to have been my 49th wedding anniversary. Little did I know as happy young bride, that years down the line I would be mourning the murder of a grandson. Kyle was fione young man, only 22 years old. He was a fun-loving product of a fun-loving family with a girl for every day of the week, and friends from all walks of life. But he was no angel. He toked a little weed, sipped a little Hennessey. He was drawn to the excitement of the street life, and loitered around the fringes of it, and like so many kids his age, was sure that he was immortal and that bad things happened to other people. He was wrong. He was driving a rental luxury car, chauffering a friend who had gang ties and whose DL was suspended, for some unsavory reason I'm sure. He was taking this guy to a liquor store at 2:AM on the notorious west side of Chicago. The girl who was with them, reported this guy yelled out the window at some other people in a car and these dudes later caught up with them and one of them leaned out of the car window and started firing at them. She said Kyle did a perfect U-turn and headed the other way before he realized that he was shot and lost control of the car slamming into a light pole. She said she'd never forget the look on Kyle's face before he passed out, that he smiled slightly almost as if saying, "damn, they got me". When the paramedics arrived, they were unable to revive him.
So a phone call came in the middle of the night, giving no info, only requesting a family member come to the John Stroger Cook County hospital. When my husband and daughter got there they were taken to a private room where they were told what happened. When my husband called to break the news, his voice was so strained I hardly recognized it as I went numb, myself. By the time my distraught daughter got back to my house there were at least 25 friends and family waiting for her at 4:AM in the morning. The news had traveled that fast. The other 2 passengers in the car were wounded and couldn't supply the poice with much information, so nobody was ever arrested for Kyle's murder, but the guy who caused it was layin low, fearing some of Kyle's friend would retaliate for his causing Kyle's death.
Where, you ask, was Kyle's father during this ordeal? Well, when she was young, my daughter was one of those good girls who liked the bad boys, and Kyle's daddy was locked up for drug dealing. They let him out to come to funeral home for a private viewing. He was escorted by 2 guards and hand-cuffed, and the the undertaker said when his father looked down in the casket at Kyle he just lost it.
Kyle was the first grand son and I have 4 other ones are who have never shown an affinity for the thug life and that's because they'll never be another Kyle.
Each of my 9 grandchildren is my favorite for a different reason. When it came to Kyle, he was my favorite because I knew who he got his rebelliousness from, but I lived to outgrow mine, unless you count having his name tattooed on my wrist.
Now, when I read the Metro section of the Chicago Sun-Times, not a day goes by that the shooting death of a young black boy isn't reported. Such a shame. And so it goes. |
Chrishayden
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Chrishayden
Post Number: 5467
Registered: 03-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, October 15, 2007 - 03:03 pm: |
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Cynique you need to share this testimony as much as you can.
I am sure it will save at least one valuable life somewhere. |
Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10303
Registered: 01-2004
Rating:
Votes: 2 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, October 15, 2007 - 08:16 pm: |
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Sharing my story with people is a catharsis. Whether it will help others or not I don't know, chrishayden.
My grandson grew up never wanting for anything, surrounded by love and encouragement and male role models. He spoke the street lingo, but he also knew how to speak standard English. As a youngster, he won trophies for tumbling and was begged by his high school swin coach to join the team after he'd watched Kyle do the free style in gym class. But Kyle was a free-spirited the exception to the rule, - a risk-taker who had crammed a whole lot of living into his young life although he never stopped whistling like a wholesome young kid. My other daughther who was like a second moms to him swore that a few days after Kyle's death, she heard whistling in her kitchen, just a clear as day, and when she rushed in there to check, the room was empty. When she told us this story, it was a source of comfort to us all because we knew that someplace somewhere Kyle was whistling a happy tune. Even so, we had this verse from Hamlet engraved on his tomb stone:
"Good Night, Sweet Prince.
May a flight of angels
Sing thee to thy rest."
OK,Y'all, I'm done. That's my therapy for the day.  |
Lambd
Newbie Poster
Username: Lambd
Post Number: 16
Registered: 02-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 - 06:19 pm: |
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Damn! I'm sorry, too, CC. Sometimes we get caught up in our own thing and don't realize how much crap other people have going on inside their heads. I feel like a total jerk right now. (Not the first time for that. I've just about kicked out all my teeth from putting my foot in my mouth so much in my life)
Alot of you folks only know the mouthy broad that appears on the discussion boards with a smart-assed comment for everything.
What you don't know is for the last few days she's been worrying about me and how I'm getting along. She's been there for me in spirit on a number of occasions as I stumble through my raggedy existence with blinders on. I never once took the time to read this stuff or even offered any type of condolences. C-neek, find a way to forgive me for being the type of friend nobody needs, and I'll try and be a gentleman from time to time instead of a turd. You know I got big respect and a lot of love for you. You got a big heart, and the cold space that your grandson left in your heart won't disappear, but your generous nature will help fill that space with the warmth of friends and family. Cyber and otherwise. Peace and love, always. You know how to get me if you need ANYTHING. |
Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10328
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 - 06:48 pm: |
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Thanks, babe. I appreciate your sweet thoughfulness.
Now stop blowing my image as a b i t c h! LOL. |
Lambd
Newbie Poster
Username: Lambd
Post Number: 18
Registered: 02-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 - 06:50 pm: |
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its not your image I'm trying to...oops. Family site...sorry. |
Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10330
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 - 06:58 pm: |
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Watch you tongue, young man... Ooooomf. |
Urban_scribe
AALBC .com Platinum Poster
Username: Urban_scribe
Post Number: 553
Registered: 05-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, October 18, 2007 - 09:59 am: |
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Wow, Madame Cynique, just wow. What a moving tribute to your grandson. I agree with Chris, you ought to make the rounds to various junior high schools and high schools across the nation and share this story. It has the power to save lives, and change them for the better. I let my teenagers read it, and the three of us sat around the computer with lumps in our throats.
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Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10333
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, October 18, 2007 - 01:23 pm: |
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I am touched by your response, Urban Scribe. I have put a face on a wide-spread ongoing tragedy. In the Chicagoland area and in most urban municipalities young black males are being shot and killed on a daily basis. Just today, in the local news a 10-year-old Chicago boy was killed in the crossfire between feuding gangs.
My daughter belongs to a "chapter" of MOMS (Mothers Of Murdered Sons)of which there are about 30 members from just a small vicinity, and each one has a sad story to tell. The streets of our inner-cities are equivalent to Iraq. The situation is critical.  |
Troy
Veteran Poster
Username: Troy
Post Number: 872
Registered: 01-2004
Rating:
Votes: 1 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, October 19, 2007 - 09:31 pm: |
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There is not much I can add. Cynique I don't read every post and it was not until this year that I learned out your tragedy. I did not mention it, because I felt too much time had passed and I was disappointed I'd not said anything sooner.
A_womon's post and the the say it all and lets me know that it is never to late to say what you feel.
I think Kyle was lucky to be surrounded by so much love. I'm not surprised he can still be heard whistling.
51 years of marriage now that is another story worth hearing too (smile). 
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Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 10371
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, October 20, 2007 - 01:12 am: |
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Thanks for your kind words of comfort, Troy.
My husband died in July 2006, 13 months after Kyle's death. He had been battling cancer and after what happened to Kyle, he just kinda gave up.
But life goes on. And so do I. My lost loved ones are both very much alive in my memory, and for that I am grateful. |
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