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Young_flame1
First Time Poster
Username: Young_flame1

Post Number: 1
Registered: 12-2005

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Posted on Tuesday, December 27, 2005 - 03:50 pm:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Sometimes I rhyme slow, sometimes I rhyme quick
I was always too slow and she was always do slick (at least that's what she wanted me to think)
I remember getting so used to the smell that at one point it didn't even stink
It just became like this natural fragrance
But through it all she remained on my "A" list
Though at night I would cry, wondering why, she continued to lie...to me
All I ever wanted was for her to love herself just a little b/c (see) the rest she would have gotten from...from me

I remember the glazed look in her third eye, while the other two mirrored the sky, purple hazed
It always amazed me how she thought that shit never phased me
I remember hanging my clothes out the window just so the stench of my old house wouldn't engage me
I remember not breathing
I remember not breathing like I remember teething (painful)
The smoke was so faint, but so potent
I remember her choking, I remember me coping (hell still coping)
I remember her smoking (shameful)
But not able, see I remember cane being the name to this fable
Only not quite a fable, quite real
I don't even think there's a bandade big enough to erase the pain I used to always feel when I looked in her face
WHEN I LOOKED IN HER FACE...Man when I LOOK in her face, I see me
Multiple by weed, divided by her second seed, whose much younger than me, but that makes three
Three generations of lost hope
Three bags of dope
Two minutes to smoke
One momment to say..."MOMMA Please"

I'd rather you hit me than that pipe
At least then I know you care
I swear
I would rather take a beating everyday, if I no longer had to smell that smell that I smelt every time I walked down the hallway...
Or in her coat, or in her hair, or see that stare
That glass-like stare that every other night penetrated through my soul to the point that I was no longer even standing there

You know I still see my face in hers
Only now it's hidden behind walls
Walls bricked with low self-esteem that stem about 80-ft tall
And every puff makes it harder to find momma
Every hit makes it harder to climb momma

She's not quite a hype yet!
More like a functional abuser
Only instead of a man, she let her circumstances use her
So maybe I'm the loser, for not allowing her to win
Or maybe I am again a victim, of a victim, created by victims of sin
"AND YOU CAN'T WIN"
I just wanted her to get out the game
But hell since my name was given to me by her Maybe my life is destined to be the same
Maybe my rhymes are meant to be slow
And after I blow, they'll be quick
Or maybe I was never shit
Or hell maybe I'll just quit
I mean after all at one point she did
But back then my excuse was..."I'M THE KID"
You know she never could give me hers....
But I love her
And now that she's in recovery, I'm discovering
That my love was all she ever needed!

Momma...
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Tonya
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Tonya

Post Number: 1155
Registered: 07-2005

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Posted on Tuesday, December 27, 2005 - 05:05 pm:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

That brought tears to my eyes... beautiful....
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Brotha2thanight
Newbie Poster
Username: Brotha2thanight

Post Number: 4
Registered: 12-2005

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Votes: 1 (Vote!)

Posted on Tuesday, December 27, 2005 - 08:32 pm:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Damn.......
Sometimes you can see clearly things you've never really seen by closing your eyes. The picture i painted in my mind using your words...touched my soul
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Young_flame1
Newbie Poster
Username: Young_flame1

Post Number: 2
Registered: 12-2005

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Posted on Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 09:34 am:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Thank you so much for the love....Art imitidating Life, imitidating art.

FYI - I wrote that poem before my mother decided to go into rehab. It is/was my testimony to/for her. It means a lot that it can touch others....b/c it is truly a piece written from my heart. She is doing extremely well.

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