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Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2490
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: 
Votes: 3 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 03:26 pm: | 
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About yesterday afternoon.
My date with Cliff turned into a disaster.
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Clifford (who asked me to call him "Cliff") picked me up at the bait shop about 2 miles down the road from the ranch. Thomas---who KNEW everything (and has a 21 year old hottie girlfriend that he now lives with in L.A.) came as usual to the ranch to spend the weekend with the boys. I took my own car to the bait shop, however, because Thomas refused to drop me off---he said he'll kill Cliff if he ever sees him (don't ask me why), because they don't know each other AT ALL--it's just that "sexism" in Tom-Trojan that I told you about).
ANYWAY--it's about a 2 hour drive to Long Beach, where you can take the daily charter boat that goes to Catalina Island, so Cliff and I got a LOT of talking done on the ride. He said he was taking me to Catalina for a "big surprise".
He's VERY nice, 36 yrs. old, one daughter (4) who lives with her mother in Trenton, very "East Coast" Type of the Black American man, which to me, is the only good type---but now that I'm FREE from Eneddio, Cliff's not nearly as exciting, aggressive, anxious or animated as he was back when he was determined to get me away from that "fucking Mexican nigga" (which actually, Eneddio's Cuban-Spaniard). Anyway--the change in EXCITEMENT level could be because I only agreed to go out with him if he toned down the sexual innuendos and protracted sideways body glances.
The boat ride from Long Beach to Catalina (which took about 1 hour 15 minutes), was REALLY wonderful, because we got to see my favorite animal---DOLPHINS!---and Cliff couldn't get over how much I love them. We had lemonaide.
We got off the boat at what I believe is called "Two Harbors", not sure, and Cliff took me to a wooded path where you catch some kind of "TRAM". While we waited--Cliff smoked a joint, which I don't mind at all (Tom-Trojan smokes weed), but he thought I was being "stuck up" when I said that I can't handle pot--which honestly, I really can't. It makes me laugh too much and I become dizzy and I can't stop eating. I can't handle it--I'd rather just have a drink and go to sleep.
Anyway, the "TRAM" (which only comes that one time per day)---came up the trail loaded with White and Latino passengers and a White Driver, and when they got up to the dock where we were waiting to board---the white driver nodded to Cliff, "The next one's got your name on it." And kept going.
Cliff ran down the TRAM, hollering and cursing, which made the people inside scream and flinch with terror--and the driver threatened to call the police, and I yelled at Cliff to come back to me and to forget the TRAM.
He did come back where I was, but he was TOTALLY PISSED--because his "surprise" was that he wanted me to see the island's buffalo. Now there was no way to do that unless we stayed over-night for Sunday, which of course, I couldn't do.
We went walking in the forest and got to see a school of sharks mating off one of the piers. It was SCARY!!!! Imagine if Cliff had been a killer and thrown me off the pier into the shark circles. I was so numb with fear, I couldn't watch it all. Cliff kept saying he wanted to throw that Tram driver to the sharks---and he meant it.
I tried to make him laugh by being "Betty Boop" and making sexy jokes--but he was distracted.
We went to a restaurant and had a big seafood dinner with margueritas---but then Cliff's Credit Card wouldn't go through.
He was SO PISSED and upset all over again. I offered to pay, but he refused. He called BANK OF AMERICA and through a fit---it turned out that they have some kind of "traveler's protection" on their card and if the charge is more than $200, it automatically declines (Cliff had bought me a HUGE stuffed dolphin that cost $130 along with our dinner and drinks). Anyway---after much embarrassment to Cliff (everyone in the restaurant had to witness him on the phone trying to get his card to clear and the waitress kept looking at him like he was an animal or something--I even asked that bitch, "What is your fuck'n problem?"---and she acted confused and innocent.)
Anyway, his card cleared, the memory of the delicious meal was ruined and we took a boat back to Long Beach.
We get back---and someone had stolen the RIMS off Cliff's car!!!!! I mean those were some bad ass hub caps.
He just wanted to kill and I didn't blame him. We had to go through the whole thing with the police--the rims were "locked" or something but had STILL managed to be stolen. I got nervous about my own car and telephoned the bait to shop to make sure my car was ok and it was.
Cliff just couldn't bring himself to talk. He drove me back into the mountains and for the whole 2 hours---scarcely said a word. He had an Angie Stone CD and I listened to that over and over again.
I guess I got home between 10 and 11 pm. Then I had to deal with TOM-TROJAN and the worst attitude---because I was late. I couldn't believe it. It really hurt my feelings, because it's so clear that I have to buy my own home and get off his ranch before I can truly be free.
What was the last straw, however---was this morning when I made breakfast---my sons weren't excited to see me (as they usually are) and they wouldn't talk to me.
The one thing I never thought Thomas would do is tell my own sons something negative and it nearly killed me.
We make it a point to treat each other a King and Queen in front of our children. We don't argue/fight in front of the boys--and we keep our "outside romantic interests" totally secret from the boys---in fact, the reason that I have so much time to sit up and talk on this board is because I spend almost ALL of my time as a "stay at home" mom, I cook, clean and look after the boys AND their father---so I felt SO BETRAYED and hurt.
Thomas doesn't usually leave until Sunday night after he's taken the boys hunting, but after the boys wouldn't speak to me at breakfast, I went the fuck off and told him that I need time alone with my sons to undo whatever he's put in their heads.
I will take the boys hunting this evening myself and try to make them understand how it is for a woman and what's going on with me.
All in all....it's been a VERY BAD weekend.
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Aurora
Newbie Poster
Username: Aurora
Post Number: 13
Registered: 04-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 04:26 pm: |
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It seems that your boys have lost respect for you and
once you loose their respect you can never regain it.
Children are very intuitive even when you sneak
around and hide things from them they still know.
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Dahomeyahosi
Regular Poster
Username: Dahomeyahosi
Post Number: 41
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 04:44 pm: |
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That's much more than a bad date Kola. I agree that if you want to be in a better position you should buy your own home. I guess I missed what happened to that cute Cuban lol. |
Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2498
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 05:21 pm: |
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Aurora (wish Cynique would come back)---
My sons are "MAD" at me, because I've went on a date with a man who is not their father....but they would never lose respect for me. They are very intelligent boys and they know me better than anyone. If it ever came to it--they would give up their father before me.
What they don't know is that their dad is LIVING with a 21 year old girl---but I will never tell them that--because I don't want to control Thomas the way that he wants to control me.
Their father left 2 1/2 years ago and I have been alone all that time---but I am still a young, vivacious woman---and my sons will come to understand that.
And they WILL NEVER see me with a man other than their father unless marriage is being contemplated.
But yes--for the first time in my life--my sons are MAD at me.
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Mzuri
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Mzuri
Post Number: 1116
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 05:36 pm: |
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We make it a point to treat each other a King and Queen in front of our children. We don't argue/fight in front of the boys--and we keep our "outside romantic interests" totally secret from the boys---in fact, the reason that I have so much time to sit up and talk on this board is because I spend almost ALL of my time as a "stay at home" mom, I cook, clean and look after the boys AND their father---so I felt SO BETRAYED and hurt.
My sons are "MAD" at me, because I've went on a date with a man who is not their father....but they would never lose respect for me. They are very intelligent boys and they know me better than anyone. If it ever came to it--they would give up their father before me.
Kola - I hate to pick but you're not making sense. First you said that you keep your rendezvous secret, but now they know you went on a date. Which is it?
And why would your sons choose you over their father??? What is WRONG WITH YOU!!! |
Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2501
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 05:42 pm: |
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If you read the first post----OBVIOUSLY their father told them I was out with another man.
From Initial Post:
What was the last straw, however---was this morning when I made breakfast---my sons weren't excited to see me (as they usually are) and they wouldn't talk to me.
The one thing I never thought Thomas would do is tell my own sons something negative and it nearly killed me.
My sons, typical of boys, are EXTREMELY protective of me and are closer to me than their father. We would never make them CHOOSE between us--which is the reason Thomas lives with us on the weekends. But my sons would also NEVER lose respect for me or place ANYONE above me.
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Mzuri
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Mzuri
Post Number: 1117
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:00 pm: |
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Well that's why I asked - it wasn't obvious what TT said about you behind your back. Looks like you need to check the man you have before you go running around with new ones. And perhaps be honest with your children, so that others don't get the opportunity to bust you out.
Anyway, I'm relieved to know that I'm not the only person who hates you - you must be as f'd up in the real world as you are on this forum. But I'm oh so happy that you weren't thrown to the hungry mating sharks. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you. LOL!!! |
Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2506
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:02 pm: |
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Thomas and Cliff don't hate me.
Neither do my sons.
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Mzuri
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Mzuri
Post Number: 1118
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:04 pm: |
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Okay smarty pants. Then why did he bust you out and try to make you look like a floozy while you were gone on this secret date? That's not love Kola. If TT respected and loved you, then he wouldn't have dissed you like that. Stop making excuses for the bullshit in your life. |
Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2507
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:35 pm: |
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Then why did he bust you out and try to make you look like a floozy while you were gone on this secret date? That's not love Kola.
Because for 10 years I've been EXCLUSIVELY his property---his woman---and he doesn't want me to get a new man.
He's a typical sexist Belizean man who wants me to stay on HIS RANCH, raise his kids and be a NUN--and he thinks that if my SONS are against me dating---then I will stop dating.
To a degree, he's right.
But that doesn't mean that he doesn't love me.
You're quite WRONG. Thomas loves me with all his heart. We both love each other in a very special way...and we always will.
Anyone reading your last post, Mzuri, would definitely see that you yourself are the one who doesn't know much about Men and Women's relationships.
Thomas has given me the world and always protected and fullfilled me. But he's still a human being--a sexist ass man.
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Sisg
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Sisg
Post Number: 268
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: 
Votes: 1 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:48 pm: |
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Kola,
hang in there girl...i know what u mean about your boys, but they will get over it, bc they love their mama...for real...sorry your date wasn't exceptional, but then again there will be more...T can't have u and cake too, as much as he would like, so keep on keeping on girl...you got to be happy with you and who u choose...i'm kinda going thru the same myself...but that's for another post. take care girl. |
Kola_boof
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 2510
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 06:53 pm: |
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Hi Sisgal!!!!!
Thank you so much. I need to call you. LOL 
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Mzuri
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Mzuri
Post Number: 1120
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, July 30, 2006 - 07:14 pm: |
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You're correct Kola. I don't understand your relationship because it is backwards. Either get back together with the man or leave. Don't stay there living on his property, dependent upon him for everything, but you're not really together, but you're going to let him control your life and be all up in your business. For someone who tries to act like they are so sophisticated, you sure seem clueless Kola. Do you think you're the only woman on God's green earth that ever took their children from their father and left? You're not even married to the man. Do you know what the most valuable thing in the world is Kola - it's FREEDOM. And the sooner you get yours, the better. And that way you can start dispensing advice based on what you know, rather than what you think you know. |
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