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Stephgirl
Regular Poster
Username: Stephgirl
Post Number: 42
Registered: 09-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 12:44 pm: | 
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Janita said in her post last August:
** If racism is over, how the heck to you explain the racial imbalances (and
apparent hierachy) in the dating and mating world? I know this is where black men
and women split but, I'm sorry, this is a very serious issue that black women are
being silenced on way too much!!! There clearly is a distinct pattern of value placed
on women. At the top are white blondes, next white women, next whiter-looking
Asian and Latinos and lighter women of other races, next light-skinned black
women, next very dark, indigenous Native Americans/Mexicans, and the list goes
on. Black men are just in denial when they
say they married a white woman just because they "happened to fall in love." I'm
not saying they don't love their wives and that races can't love each other but I'm
saying that RACE MATTERS in interracial unions. Many black men feel they are
pulling themselves up with a white woman, they feel white women are more
beautiful and, beyond that, simply more valuable as mates, and they want to have
lighter-skinned offspring because they believe those children will fair better in --
shall I say it? -- this racist society. On the flip side, if racism is over, why do the
vast majority of white men still think it is a step down for them to have a black
girlfriend or wife? Sure, sex on the down-low with a black woman is acceptable but
black women are taboo as girlfriends and wives. And, forgive me for putting it this
way, but that applies not just to the
black women in the hood who have the hard looks but also to the clearly very
beautiful black women who fit the larger beauty standards -- the Halle and Nia and
Janet lookalikes; they, too, have a harder time finding a mate and white men still
believe something is wrong with formally dating and marrying black women. That is
racism!**
From Stephanie |
Serenasailor
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Serenasailor
Post Number: 373
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 07:41 pm: |
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First of all, I know nothing of a racial heirarchy. Maybe, you are putting yourself in a hierarchy. Secondly, any black man that cannot appreciate a beautiful black woman is an idiot! Plain and Simple! As far as white men go I can give a fuck less what a white man deems as beautiful and respectable. We already established long time ago that the white man is EVIL!! So why should we care what he thinks? |
Shemika
Regular Poster
Username: Shemika
Post Number: 32
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, March 16, 2006 - 12:25 am: |
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Yeah Stephanie, unfortunately, every bit of this is true. But the reasons are clear given the history of this society. It is a mere combination of sexism and racism coming into play. Women are on one level considered a status symbol and judged more along the racist lines of traditionally favored physical features. And men's attractiveness is less associated with whether he measures up to such racially based criteria. This selective brand of pickiness also has a lot to do with the ratio of available males to females. |
Anunaki3600
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Anunaki3600
Post Number: 148
Registered: 04-2005
Rating: 
Votes: 2 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, March 16, 2006 - 03:02 am: |
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You are missing a big point which is social and economic CLASS difference between the couple. A person relates a lot better with someone who has the same CLASS background. Their values and culture are similar when they come from the same class and some can overcome racial difference if they are from the same class. An upper middle class AA has very little in common with an AA from the poor or underclass even if the AA from the lower economic class is a light skinned woman. He may want to take laps in her pool but that how far it will go. SO my point here is that in the dating game CLASS is an important indicator. |
Shemika
Regular Poster
Username: Shemika
Post Number: 33
Registered: 02-2006
Rating:
Votes: 2 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, March 16, 2006 - 11:33 am: |
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Although class can have some bearing, it is closely linked to race. Whites who are poor have been traditionally shown more respect and consideration then well off blacks. That’s why black entertainers still had to go to colored only bathrooms. All their money and success couldn’t purchase equal treatment. Wealthy men have often been known to marry poor women with socially acceptable racial backgrounds, even going so far as to marry those from extremely poor backgrounds out of mail order bride catalogs. . |
Doberman23
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Doberman23
Post Number: 234
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, March 16, 2006 - 01:34 pm: |
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Anunaki3600
i had to give u 5 stars on that one. shemika your right to a degree too, but these aren't necessarily women ... there more like posessions when the class difference gaps too far apart. |
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